Saturday, April 30, 2011

Whoops...

     I just logged on to catch up on all the blogs and saw I haven't posted for exactly a month. To be honest, I'm sitting here and I still can't think of anything I want to write about. But I guess that's something. And as long as I'm being honest I can say I'm not the biggest fan of blogging. I understand that its a big group and we all have very different and busy schedules so blogging is a very good way of keeping in touch; but I find myself, much like right now, trying to force it. And its taking longer than usual because there are about seven gnats flying around the computer room and I've caught three but the other four are both swift and clever.
     Anyway this brings up an interesting point I've been pondering for, well, years I suppose. I like to absorb. In any group setting where more than four people are gathered I tend to sit back and soak in whatever conversation is happening. That's not to say I'm not participating. I'm just not adding anything. This may stem from growing up eight years behind three chatty sisters (I used to raise my hand at the dinner table if I wanted to say something). In high school my teachers would talk to me about not participating because I never brought books to class or took notes when they gave reviews for tests and they would give me lectures about paying attention and putting forth effort. But I got good grades because that's just how my brain works. If I take notes my brain won't remember what I wrote because it thinks, "Well it's written down now--and I could always look at it later."
     I'm not sure where this is going but it has something to do with the fact that, while I read every one of your blogs, I don't comment on them or write my own. Or how on Saturdays, I don't speak unless spoken to but I always get a lot out of the discussions. And I don't think its a self-confidence thing because, quite frankly, everything I say is solid gold. In light of that, I'm gonna bless you with one more paragraph that'll bring all this nonsense to a head.
     My dad used to read Proverbs to me before bed. Over and over. He'd finish it and then start over. And only one idea stands out in my memory from those readings: talking too much is foolish. It seemed like every night there would be some verse about how much better it is to pipe down rather than sound off. So I guess rather than keep typing I'd like to get your feedback on that idea. Because I like to absorb.

8 comments:

  1. Yesterday at Circles I glanced over at you and I thought to myself, wow he is really taking all this in, seriously, so this is quite funny. I think you are really right on with the idea that stood out to you in Proverbs. One of my favorite verses is in 1 Peter and it talks about being a gentle and quiet spirit. There is a lot of value in that, but it takes away opportunities to be prideful. Pride is so poisonous and strips us from intimacy with God. Humility and a quiet spirit are good things. Everyone has different gifts that add to the one, unified body of Christ. We are definitely called to lift up our brothers and exhort them, but I'm not sure there is only one way to do that. As long as you feel like you are practicing in and with the body, I feel like that is okay, and great. However, Darin could argue with me and say that commenting and blogging was one of our commitments, so we also need to uphold that. Hmmm... sorry this is all very unresolved, but those are some of my thoughts.

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  2. i like your style ryan. maybe your blogs could be a reflection of your absorbtion. and then instead of writing long comments maybe you could just say "aobsorbed." hahaha. but yeah I need to absorb more and talk less.

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  3. so, when you left on saturday I thought you were just being quiet or what not. what's kinda funny is that I am the same way in group settings. I am fine with soaking everything in. I never thought in school that I wasn't not participating, I just didn't have any questions or comments, and I didn't really care if my opinion was heard by the rest of the class. but I have had a few conversations with myself about this, and I have come to the conclusion that I have lived a lot in a short amount of years, and as much as I don't need to be heard, maybe-- just maybe-- other people would like to hear me the same way I would like to absorb their comments. that is why I push myself to talk in big group settings. what's interesting is I am actually a talker... there are three girls and one boy in my family too and if you want to be heard you need to be loud! being the youngest, I am last to be heard so after absorbing the opinions and emotions of the first three siblings, what I have to say can actually reflect all of that. I have become a peacemaker of sorts because I can absorb and then carefully communicate resolve. idk if you are like this at all, but I guess my point, after all that rambling, is that the people you are absorbing would also really like your feedback on discussions. : )

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  4. thank you for sharing this, ryan. oh my gosh though...you crack me up. "both swift and clever." i die. anyway, the ability to absorb and be few with my words is definitely not my forté, but i see so much truth in those things being good. thank you for being an example of that. also, remember that we are called to be in community and relationship as well; oftentimes, that will require you to speak, to be open and vulnerable. not sure where you're at with that in your close relationships, but i just wanted to remind you :)

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  5. mmmmm, I liked absorbing this post. People give me crap for not "opening up" and spilling my guts, talking all the time. I'm sorry. I just feel the same way, that its better to listen then say something foolish, better to take in then talk about yourself. Though you are a bit more extreme then I am.

    You're first paragraph with the gnats made me laugh.

    I like reading your thoughts and knowing what is going on. I want to get to know you better so please share. Thanks Ryan :)

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  6. I think your style of sitting back and absorbing is awesome. I think more people could learn from that and absorb more themselves. It takes patience and self-control to sit back and let others talk while your own opinion and thoughts brew inside of your mind, rather than blurting out the first thing that comes to your mind. I have learned that there is amazing beauty in this patience of holding your tongue and opening your heart/mind. It is simple...when we talk, we can't listen. You can't do both at the same time and quite frankly it is a lost art to have a real conversation these days. No one lets anyone finish their thoughts completely before speaking themselves and I think your wisdom is solid gold, my friend.

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  7. Ryan.
    You are solid.
    Thank you for exemplifying a characteristic of what a disciple of Christ is.
    A sponge. A sponge to His Word. A sponge in His presence. And a sponge to His affirmation and delight over you.

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  8. God has created us all different personalities and ways of being involved in a group. I love that He creates us all uniquely so that we can all bring something different to the body. God has given you a gift to listen and to absorb. Thanks for being honest in sharing how you work as a person. Also, I agree with Corinne though please continue to blog so we can get to know you better. :)

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